The Gilmore Girls Did Not Prepare Me for Marriage
Fall in love with someone who doesn’t make you think love is hard. -Anonymous
I was perusing the interwebs the other day and I came across this quote on Pinterest.
From a quick glance and move on perspective many people may not realize how this type of thinking could play out in their own relationships. Some may think “Yes! This is exactly what I am looking for ,or “If only a man out there like this existed…”
When my husband and I started dating, he was the first man to ever call me out in love about my heart issues. I had no idea the amount of unforgiveness, anger, and fear I was holding onto. Of course, when we are called out in our sin our first reaction is not often resulting in a bear hug of thankfulness for them making you see the light. ( If this is you? Oh Bless you…)
My reactions came from the overflow of what existed in my heart, which meant it was not always pretty. I started to become discontent.
The reality is, love and marriage is not easy. Sin is painful. Happiness is not pursuable because it is ever changing. Contentment is pursuable because it is rooted in Christ, who is unchanging.
To be content in my marriage meant that I needed to run to God and ask him what it means to be in a marriage that is glorifying to him. Then be willing to have him show me the areas in which I needed a full on rehabilitation of my thinking.
To erase my views and expectations that I had learned growing up watching tv shows, listening to pop songs, and even the marriages I saw with my own eyes. I needed to start with a blank slate, that was based on Jesus and him alone.
It will discourage the man you love and create an environment of insecurity. I know this because I have walked on this road before. Sister, look at your husband with a thankful heart. Look at the man that God is molding before your eyes (remember sanctification is rough!), and as I type this I am saying this to myself as well. Be thankful that God has chosen you above all other women to walk with your husband and be there to witness and see the man of God he is laying out before you.
Being content in marriage can be a struggle because our flesh will always be looking for more. To be content is to keep our desires in check, and if they are not in line with what God has for you as his daughter, and you as a wife. Chuck ‘em out of the window! His desires for you will always be sweeter, than the temporary fix we tend to cling onto.
Contentment will not happen overnight, but embrace the process, sister! I promise you it will be worth it.
Note: If you are in a relationship that is abusive and harmful, this is not a post for you to learn how to be content. Sister, please reach out to someone you trust that can help you get out of this environment, and truly know that you are a beloved daughter of a King.
October 14, 2016
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